Oof.

Wow. Well, first I want to thank my loyal reader(s) for their positive job vibes on, um, yesterday (why is it I'm losing days now? I mean, seriously, folks, I'm retarded). But, basically, as I told Colleen, well, I'm going to just quote exactly what I told Colleen, because I'm tired and even though it's only 9:34 by my clock, I wanna go to bed (yes, I may be 30, but it's an old 30. Like, 50. Gimme my tapioca, bee-atch!)

The job interview was pretty much how I expected it to go. The "interview" was basically to make sure I didn't have a third eye in the middle of my forehead or something like that - much in the way a retail interview goes ("She's breathing, she's hired."). Right now, until fall, they can only offer me 7.5 hours a week. That's right. SEVEN AND A HALF. Mondays 6-8:30 PM, Fridays 10A-3P. Woo hoo. At a whopping $7.50 an hour. Not even $60 a week, $225 a month (BEFORE taxes). I'd be a front desk monkey, taking people's cards, signing people up, giving people info, things like that. Wow, now we can afford the house! Hell, we can't even afford to charge the digital camera I want. If I want it, I can start when we get back from Disney. I might take it just to see how many hours I get once fall comes around, when the college kids go back to school. If I can get 20 hours a week at that price, I can at least make $600 a month. And in a year, I can get a raise. Oooooh, $7.75 an hour? Sheesh. Can you tell I'm thrilled?

There it is. The email to Colleen. I'm a lazy bastard, huh? So I'm thinking I'm going to take it, because even a little money is better than, um, NO money, which is what this financial drain on the family, aka, the SAHM, makes now. I know there are studies that show moms who stay home for even a short time lose money in the workplace (because, you know, we women aren't getting fucked enough by the patriarchy making less money and working more hours than men, on top of having our reproductive abilities count AGAINST us, despite the fact that we FURTHER THE SPECIES [well, some of us]), but SEVEN FIFTY AN HOUR?!?! How insulting that I'd be making only a dollar more an hour than I did working at Borders FIVE YEARS AGO. But I'm not bitter. I guess I'll take it, because I'm not in a position to fall back on pride or the fact that, once upon a time, I made decent money (ok, decent money for an editor - which is basically only slightly better than decent money for a secretary - which I could have been if I'd not wasted my time going to college and amassing huge debt that will haunt me for the rest of my viable life, not to mention all that time I could have been working and SAVING). Geez. Ok, I admit it, you twisted my arm, I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOO bitter. It doesn't help that today Hurricane and I spent the afternoon at the in-laws house (Hubster was at a Phillies game) and my daughter has SO much fun outside it's not even funny. And I can't provide that for her. We have a postage stamp yard that is basically a toilet for the 95-pound moron dog from hell, so no place for the kid to really play. And she just adores being outside, running around in the sun and the grass and the wind. And I hate the fact that, to get out of here and into even a decent house (because the market here, despite the downturn almost everywhere else, is still high - great for selling, shitty for buying) I'd have to work full-time. But if I go back full-time to afford a house, I'd have to leave kid #2 (and there WILL be a kid #2 - not right now, but soon) as an infant to go back to work. I didn't do that with Hurricane, and I'm loathe to do it with another child. And not having another kid isn't an option - hubster and I both really want one (not to mention the fact that Hurricane would make a great older sister). So there you have it - another pity party from yours truly. I've just been full of sunshine and happiness lately, huh?

Lookit the sheep. Cute little sheep.

Oh, yeah, and Col? I'll do the meme tomorrow!